This post is about my last full day with Brielle. Brielle was born on Thursday, November, 12 the day before, we celebrated Uncle Zach’s birthday and did some fun stuff for Brielle too. Grandma made biscuits and gravy (my favorite breakfast) and we had a nice family morning outside on the deck. And then Mom, Grandma, Brielle, and I went out to grab some things. We went to Whole Foods and I picked out a strawberry lotion for Brielle. I did not know at the time how attached I’d get to that lotion. I also bought Brielle a strawberry cupcake and a fruit tarte. I picked out the fruit tarte that had all of her favorites: pineapple, raspberry, blueberry, and strawberry.

Earlier that morning, Zach had decided he wanted to have his 21st birthday dinner at Atlanta Grill in the Ritz. Zach, Tessa, and Dad had gone downtown to celebrate Zach’s birthday. Dad was supposed to find a cafe to hang out at while Tessa and Zach had a date, but they were all closed, so Dad kind of tagged along on Zach’s birthday date. At least they had a photographer for the day. Anyways, we all met them at the restaurant.

It was a pretty drive, Waze took us through Geogia Tech’s campus to get there and we drove around Olympic Park. The Christmas lights were up, the leaves on the trees were beautiful shades of reds, oranges, and yellows. The sun was setting, it was a really beautiful night. I’m glad Brielle had such a beautiful last night.

I’m going to include my writing from my diary for the rest of the day. I think it does a better job of capturing how I felt that evening.

“Once we were home we didn’t have much time before we had to leave for the Atlanta Grill. I had a snack before we left. Brielle was very appreciative, she was starving. Brielle and I were ravenous by the time we got to the restaurant. We had some pretzel bread when we got to the table. Dad, Tessa, and Zach met us there. I looked at the menu and ordered Brielle a filet with red wine sauce and whipped potatoes. When the food came Brielle jumped with excitement over her steak and potatoes. That is always a meal she loves! She danced and had fun. By the time dessert came, we were stuffed and I chose to not have any and instead have some of the cake at home.

Once we were all home we pulled out Zach’s cake and lit the candles and Tessa put in a pink candle in Brielle’s strawberry cupcake and lit it. Zach and I stood by the cakes and everyone sang us happy birthday. I sang to Brielle and Zach too and rubbed on her while we sang. I think she had fun! We then toasted with champagne and I toasted with her cupcake. Mommy is not giving Brielle alcohol. Brielle enjoyed her cupcake! We all laughed and had fun and it was really just wonderful. It was wonderful to give Brielle a celebration, it may be her only one and everyone was just happy. Hopeful. It was a very fun night.

Then we watched Finding Nemo. Brielle really liked that movie! She did lots of big wiggles and we laughed a lot. I love how she loves movies with a lot of water, she is a fish herself! Everyone had fun with that movie. After the movie we decided to read Brielle her stories. Mom read her “It Will Be Okay” and Brielle enjoyed it. That was such a good memory to make with Brielle. David videod a lot of it. After she finished the book Mom kissed little Brielle and I started crying. I just want Brielle to live. Tessa then read “Giraffes Can’t Dance.” Tessa talked and played with Brielle as she read it. I think Brielle had a lot of fun! She responded a lot and Dad finally got to feel her move. David said that he had a very big smile when she did it. Brielle’s Papa loves her. My Mom also read Brielle “Silver Slippers” and Brielle enjoyed that too! Brielle had such a fun night. By the time we had finished reading and playing I was exhausted. I ate Brielle’s fruit tarte at 11:20 PM (40 minutes before the cut off time for eating before surgery). I think Brielle liked it, it had all of her favorites!

I took a shower and David shaved my legs. I played Brielle her music while I showered too. I wanted Brielle to have fun. David and I prayed very hard over her, we are both so scared. And we prayed and prayed. David read her “On the Night You Were Born” which she liked. It feels good to just feel her happy. I don’t know how to explain it, there’s is just a vibe (for a lack of a better word) I get from her, and it feels happy and content. I’m glad that I can feel that and make her feel that way. Of course there was crying, worry, and fear. But we’ll just have to trust God.”